Six last-minute Valentine’s Day gifts that honestly don’t suck
Happy Monday. Hoope you had a good weekend. Don’t you feel like you’re forgetting something, though? No, it’s not “Friday”’s birthday (that was on, of all days, Friday). And no, it’s not anything that happened at the Grammys (because the whole thing is, per usual, forgettable). Think hard. Harder. Here’s a hint: it’s February 13.
Odds are, you’re not going to be able to get a reservation anywhere decent today -- but that doesn’t mean that V-Day is a total loss. Especially if, you know, you’ve got someone special expecting something special. And even if your mate claims to “not be that into Valentine’s Day,” it’s a known fact that small, thoughtful, awesome gifts are rarely unwelcome. So whether you’ve dropped the ball entirely, or just want to get one more little thing, here are some not-terrible Valentine’s Day gifts to pick up on your way home from work.
Theo’s Aphrodisiac Collection
Theo chocolate is local, yummy and made without the added crap that you’d find in a Russel Stover’s sampler from Bartell. Their 8-piece aphrodisiac collection is full of sexytime flavors that are sure to do whatever sexytime chocolates are supposed to do.
Cash
Everyone needs it, and yet, for some reason, everyone’s too shy to give it. Wrap it in a nice ribbon, put it in a beautiful envelope (you can get one at just about any paper supply or gift store), write a little poem about how it’s only meant to be used for something really special (and that you’re definitely not giving it because you forgot) and fork it over.
A plant
Flowers are already dead. That’s like giving someone milk that has a single day left before it expires. Instead, opt for a nice, hearty plant. Like an aloe plant. One that’s really hard to kill. You can find some pretty cool ones just about any area garden store.
A small tin of natural solid cologne or perfume
The great thing about a scent as a gift (assuming the giftee is not allergic/migraine prone -- do check in advance) is that it will always remind that person of you. But perfumes and sprays are so aggressive (and, often, gross-smelling). Instead, do a quick search for cute, decorative tins of solid scent, which is more mild -- and sexier. This is also a good gift if your beloved has body odor.
A harmonica
You know what’s an awesome, inexpensive gift? A harmonica. Perfect for the manic pixie dream girl (or guy) in your life, a mouth organ is vaguely sexual and super fun. Pretty much any music store is guaranteed to have one or any talented hobo.
Whatever you’ve been meaning to give back to them but haven’t for like a hundred years
Come on, everyone has one of these. A book, a sweater, a DVD -- whatever it is, clean it up, wrap it in beautiful gift-wrap, tape a piece of chocolate to it and call it a day. If Valentine’s Day isn’t that big of a deal anyway, why not use it to shore up some long-unresolved minor controversy?
